A badly phrase rant about horrible things to get me through the night.

Tumblr is ridiculous. No, let me rephrase that: the people on Tumblr are ridiculous. They make me feel something that can only be adequately described with an obscene amount of 'fuck's. And I do mean obscene. Like, the type of number you find in astrophysics. The length in years of the current astronomical decade, let's say. Plus the next. The first problem I have with the users of Tumblr is their obsession and simultaneous debasement of hipster culture. Of course the modern hipster is quite evolved from their beatnik and hippie roots, but the number of 'ironic' posts on the matter of triangles and 'indie kids' is perhaps just a little infuriating. Even worse, you can feel that tiny grain of sincerity that emerges from sarcastic comments such as "I'm so indie" and "Does this triangle make me hipster?" You can tell in the way they say "don't tell your Facebook friends about Tumblr" like they're in some kind of secret club, and "that's not what Tumblr is for". People should just grow up. Quit ansgting.

I had so much angry stuff to pontificate on but forgot it all in the shower while singing Gotta Knock A Little Harder at the top of my lungs, higher even than that maybe. Why am I wearing a shirt? It makes no sense. I should get as naked as I can right now. Oh right, this computer is next to the kitchen. Not in my room anymore, gotcha.

I remembere now! I had vague plans to write about my brother. A perfect source of rage. I am the perfect storm and he is the sudden drop in pressure. I'll tear this house apart if he doesn't move out soon. Mum's stopped washing his clothes in protest. Dad's threatened to put a lock on his room while he's out and move all his stuff onto the curb. I'd offer to help but I have to live with him for the meantime. I had the perfect metaphor to explain him. Better than that storm bullshit I threw up a few lines back.

Slowly, in the past year, since my brother finished his VCE (which he did terrible on, just by the by) he has slowly become the very description of the worst housemate ever. EVER. I do not exaggerate. I wouldn't move in with him if he begged me to and claimed that his landlord was threatening to take his thumbs. I'd even buy the thumbs.

He's always been a bit of a wanker, he did all that older brother stuff that older brothers tend to do. Up until last year I habitually flinched whenever I walked past him in the hall, and I still have self-image issues from his taunting and name-calling when I was in primary school. I tried to like him as a brother, I really did. I didn't do too well on that front. He just a little bit stupid. He can't think about other people.

Just today I went into his room on one of my regular trips to recover all the stuff he nicks from mine: albums, Gameboy cartridges, underwear. Yes, even underwear. Worse still he sometimes lends my stuff to other people: to this day I only have one of the three discs from the Black Books DVD set I got for Christmas once. He's like an internet pirate, but in real life. So... a pirate. No, a thief. I wouldn't mind if he was a pirate; he'd still take my stuff but he'd do it with flair. He's 19 for fuck's sake, he should stop acting like he's 12.

He did terrible in VCE, back in the days of ENTER (2 years ago) he got a 54, give or take. Obviously, he didn't get into the course he wanted, and since then he's worked very little, despite the fact that he's been the job he currently has for over 3 years. You'd think he could get a few more hours. And because he's worked very little he has so much more time to do fuck all. He goes out all night, sleeps all day, and comes home at three in the morning and plays dubstep very loudly. It's very disruptive for everybody. He doesn't even let anyone know where he's going or when he'll be back, then he complains when we don't leave the doors unlocked because we didn't know when he'd be back and assumed it'd the next day. He's a fuckwit. A real cunt. Furthermore, he refuses to pay board on the grounds that... fair enough, he has no reason. He can still cover himself in tattoos and go clubbing every night though.

Recently everyone else was on holiday. It was just me and him in the house. He had about a week home alone before I got back. The first thing I did was go shopping; there was no proper food in the house, which was a fucking mess by the way. Oh, and I went shopping with my own money. Then he ate all my noodles. Then I asked him to go shopping to return the favour. He said he would, he even wrote up a little list. Then he went out to do what I presumed was purchasing groceries. He came back 5 hours later with nothing. He said he couldn't be bothered. I inadvertently spent good money on him, and he didn't return the favour because he's a lazy idiot. THEN he took the spare key which we leave outside just in case someone needs to get in the house when no one is there, so I had to climb in a window every time I got home. It was nice when everyone else got back and he had to start watching himself again.

He just does remarkably stupid things.

I don't have any other big things. Dammit.

Only small, petty things. He puts music on really loud in his room then opens the door and goes outside. Who the fuck does that? Seriously. Fuckwits, that's who.

Well I'm done bitching.

Everyone's gone to bed, so I can get mostly naked now.

SCORE.